Monday, December 29, 2014

It's My Life, It's Now or Never...[Dec. 29, 2014]



Serving at Christmas time was fantastic! We wrote letters to members in our branch and less actives and everyone was happy as we delivered them and people just LOVE talking about Christ at Christmas time. I also got to skype my family. (We told Debbie we got to skype our family and she was like, "What the heck is that!?" It was hilarious! Sometimes I think she just came out of a time machine.) It was brilliant seeing everyone and I had the special treat that my bro (serving in Mexico) randomly started skyping when I was on, so we got to three way with him for a bit.
We went to Debbie's Christmas night and something really weird, but awesome that is hard to describe happened. She was sitting there and we were chatting and she was looked at me and said, "Have you decided?" I was like, "Uuhh about what?" She then thought about it and was like, "I'll do this right." She said she prayed for me the night before (she's been worried about me bc apparently I look like something is bothering me whenever she sees me) and she had a really weird/crazy dream that night (she has vivid dreams sometimes). She said that someone (she claimed was Christ) told her to sanitize her hands, then stand in front of me and put her hands on my shoulders and tell me this, "It is your decision to make. You have to make yourself happy. You can't worry about what anybody else wants or makes you do. It's your life."
Crazy, because first off, that's exactly what I needed to hear; and second, because remember like back in September, I talked about a lady and she was a druggie and hit rock bottom. We really randomly ran into her, so I was trying to get some sense into her. She reeked of alcohol, but I put both hands on her shoulders and told her she needed to make changes in her life and do things for herself. I realized that I was on the other end of it and I need to really stop worrying about what other people think. I need to make decisions to do things, not based upon what people will think of it, but because I need to do that for myself. I don't know if that makes sense to anyone else, but it finally clicked for me. I was taking away my own agency, by deciding to do things solely because others would judge me if I don't or whatever. But if I consciously decide not to worry about what others think about it, then I am making that decision for myself.
I've been working on it and I have been immensely happier, the stress is oozing off of me, because I'm not so worried about what people think anymore, I don't even care! It's my life, dang it!!
I keep thinking my memory is going to run out of song lyrics for blog titles, but they keep coming. Maybe in like another six months it will have to be Lower Light lyrics or something.
A sister in our district ended her mission a couple weeks early, to go home to a cruise, so we are currently in a trio covering two areas that are an hour drive apart and miles aren't reimbursed...yay...But it's been good. And cold. And our car looks like death...because whenever we think of cleaning it, it starts snowing again.
I'm also super stoked, because Debbie finally took out her dream catcher making supplies and she
is going to teach us how to make legit ones, pictures will follow when we are done.


[She sent two pics of her and her comp butchering a pig, but it is a scan and I cannot figure out how to get it to copy here.]




Debbie's Tumbletree

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